Fatherhood
CSD 2013 Summer Mission – 430 at 43
My man Jack LaLanne would try to do some feat of strength and endurance every birthday. As I hit the big 4-3 this summer, I figured it would be cool to try to do the same thing myself every year. Like many warm-weather lovers, I come alive and my vitality increases one hundred fold when the weather is warm, so setting a summer time goal is perfect for me.
So what did Jack do at 43? According to this site, he:
1957 Age 43: Swam the treacherous Golden Gate Channel, towing a 2,500-pound cabin cruiser. This involved fighting the cold, swift ocean currents that made the 1 mile swim a 6 ½ mile test of strength and endurance.
Wow.
Well, lets just say that I’m going to start off small compared to his performance.
At 43, I’d like to:
Deadlift – 430 lbs.
Bicycle – 430 miles
Now, I know those totals aren’t much to many people reading this, but it has value to me. First. I’ve deadlifted over 430 lbs. before in my younger days. My brother can deadlift 505 lbs. just getting out of bed, no warm-up, and with Beethoven playing in his ears. But for me to handle that kind of weight requires consistency on my part. I can get workout routine A-D-D and not stick to the tried and true compound-skill lifts that require dedication to really get the numbers up. Plus, since dudes like to do the curls-for-girls in the power rack, it’s often hard to get an Olympic bar with the space around me to warrant keeping the DL in my routine on a consistent basis. But, now that the weather’s better and my homegym is open for business again (check out Jason’s article here for some great tips on training at home), I can pull with the deadlift bar (hex bar) and even use the Olympic bar if I have to. So this goal will likely be the most convenient, but surely the hardest to achieve.
Next is logging 430 miles on my rusty-trusty bike. Sadly, there are only a few good months to ride the bike in my area but it’s something I absolutely love doing. Having the time will be the biggest challenge on this one, but I’m looking forward to knocking it out as an early morning ride is the most tranquil thing I do. Okay, maybe cruising with the sounds going in harmony with the Flowmasters is up there as well, but that activity doesn’t burn any calories.

My bike ride view in the early morning…ah yes, I must admit that when you get as depressed as I do in the winter, you appreciate the warmer days so much more!
So where am I at right now? Well, as of today:
Deadlift – 365 x 3
Bike Miles – 71 miles (5 rides)
How about you? Any goals you have for your next birthday? Forget that New Year’s resolution stuff, if you’ve already failed there, why not use your birthday as a new target?
I’ll keep you posted on my progress!
CSD
Happy Mother’s Day!
…from Cornerstonedad!
Bodybuilding Loses Joe Weider and Nasser El Sonbaty
The bodybuilding world was shocked recently with the loss one of its underrated stars and one of its founders.
Nasser El Sonbaty passed away on March 20, 2013. It has been reported that he died in his sleep in Egypt. El Sonbaty did not fit the “dumbbell” stereotype that is often perpetuated in bodybuilding, but he was a graduate of the University of Augsburg with a degree in history, political science, and sociology. Perhaps it was this tremendous amount of knowledge that led to the belief that he was a messageboard legend named GH15, the name used by someone on the “inside” of bodybuilding and was not afraid to tell all of its secrets and give the truth on training and supplementation.
I met Nasser one year at the Arnold Classic Fitness Expo in the late ’90’s and he certainly seemed to be fan friendly (sometimes you can tell a lot in a quick 2 minute meeting…for instance Vince Taylor was great, Lou Ferrigno, not so much). In 1997, many felt Nasser beat the champ Dorian Yates, but as many 2-5 contestants learn in the shows, it’s hard to beat the man on the top. I loved bodybuilding during this time and that was my “glory age” and Nasser was certainly no joke. I’m not going to speculate on what the cause of death was for him to die at 47 years of age, but I know what you’re thinking. But then I know that many people suddenly die for a myriad of reasons, so until I hear that drugs caused the early death, I think it’s best for all of us to reserve judgement.
Then on March 23, 2013, Joe Weider died at 93. Perhaps Joe Weider is the man responsible for making it where we can all touch a dumbbell. Bodybuilding existed more as a subculture for many years, but Weider and his family took it to the masses with magazines, supplements, contests (e.g. Mr. Olympia) and of course, equipment. Everyone I know started with a Joe Weider bench when they first got introduced to weight training as a kid. I know I sure did and I’m sure I have some sort of Weider product in my house 20 years later.

I shook the hand and had my picture taken with Ronnie Coleman as well before he became Mr. Olympia, but I don’t think he was as honored as he is in this shot with Joe.
However, it must be said, that what made Joe’s success in bodybuilding also made him a sort of pariah. Just as baseball turned a blind-eye to drug use in its sport in order to drive attendance after the 1994 strike, it is said Joe Weider did the same thing as his “athletes” did more and more drugs in order to at least get into the money spots in his contests. You weren’t at the top of the game, until you won the Mr. Olympia. While other sports count rings, bodybuilding counts Sandows. Joe Weider was responsible for making that Sandow matter to the contestants and us fans.
Many folks brought Air Jordan’s because they thought they’d play better basketball, they bought the baseball mitt because of their favorite baseball player, so can we really be mad at Joe for influencing people to use the supplements of their favorite “Weider athlete”? Yes, I know, Weider didn’t tell that his athletes were using all kinds of drugs to get into that shape, but NIKE didn’t come out and tell that Michael Jordan would’ve been Michael Jordan whether he wore their shoes or not.
So in that case, I can’t hate the playa or the game.
But I don’t care what anybody says, wearing a Kangol and Adidas are RPEs – “Rhyming Performance Enhancers”.

Like everything involving weight training and nutrition, Weider had a habit of putting his label on everything, whether he earned it or not.
CSD
CSD Dinner Table Topic of the Day: Do Fathers Have a Role in Gun Control?
Interesting blog post from the National Fatherhood Initiative.
I’d like to hear your position as well.
Do you allow your sons to play with toy guns?
Do you feel it has had an impact on how they view violence?
Let us know in the comment section below.
“Are boys obsessed with weapons? Is your home a toy gun-free home? I’ll be first to admit that I’m a toy-weapon tolerant dad. I allow my son to play with toy guns and swords. Boys naturally like to play with toy weapons and there’s nothing wrong with acting out make-believe combat with toy guns and swords.
I grew up without toy weapons at home. My solution was to make my own weapons. I made cardboard machine guns and grenade launchers like a young Sylvester Stallone in Rambo. I made Samurai swords out of tree branches and any L-shape object became a hand gun including my baby sister’s Barbie dolls.
Many parents forbid their children from playing with toys guns. Many view toy weapons as corruptors of children, exposing them to aggressive and violent behaviors and reinforcing gender stereotypes.
The tragic event in Newtown, CT put the debate on gun control in the spotlight again and many parents followed suit imposing their own toy gun control and zero-tolerance policies in their households. But is this the right response to the issue of violence? Should parents keep their sons away from toy weapons and impose a weapon-free zone at home? Should zero-tolerance policies be extended to playgrounds, schools and other public venues?
Boys naturally gravitate toward weaponry not because of their desire to kill or hurt another human being but because of their desire to be heroes. Boys have a natural willingness to do great things, be adventurous and to be rescuers. They need to feel like heroic warriors and toy weapons help bring out their imagination and act out their fantasies. It is one way boys are molded to be mature courageous men.
Play is play and violence is violence. What’s essential is that fathers educate their sons to understand and differentiate the two in their playtime. Their make-believe games are opportunities to teach boys to distinguish between what’s right and wrong and what’s good and evil. Penny Holland, author of “We Don’t Play with Guns Here,” says toy weapons were “part of…making sense of the world (imitating) timeless themes of the struggle between good and evil.”
Parents should recognize and respect what young boys are dreaming to be and experiencing in their play. Fathers were once young boys too and played fierce battles with evil monsters and alien invaders. We usually grow up wanting to be heroes.
Sometimes I wish my son would simply pretend he’s a magician or a race car driver; but right now he wants to be a gun-trotting Pirate and Captain America. All a weapons-tolerant dad like me can do is to play along with my imaginary laser gun and light saber and model to him the right and honorable way to save the day.
Do you let your child play with toy weapons? Why or why not?”
Source: NFI
Dad, Do They Know You Still Love Them?
A couple of weeks ago, our church started a group of meetings called the Life Action Summit. Quite honestly, my percentage level to attend was under 50%, as those “revival” type meetings are usually full of bad theology, financial begging, and as my boy Rob would say, “Momma-say-momma-sa-mumombusa”…in other words…speaking in tongues with no sign of an interpretation coming from anywhere.
All I can say is: OUCH.
I went for 11 days and:
Many of the lessons that I heard exhorted me to return to my first love, Jesus Christ.
Many of the lessons that I heard exhorted me to return to the love and commitment I have for my wife.
But many of the other lessons the I heard exhorted me to return to being the father that I am supposed to be as well.
Now why am I writing this to you?
Even if you are not a Christian, I think what I’m about to say applies to you.
Do you need to return to the love you had for your children when they were born?
Like a wedding, I’ve found that parents have showers, celebrate, cry, tell everyone and are just so excited about becoming parents when the woman announces she’s pregnant and delivers the baby. However, after a few years, just like marriage, that loves seems to change.
From 0-5, they are cute and we are patient, as they discover this world and still have a smile that melts our hearts.
From 6-10, they’re not as cute and that smile now gets accompanied with a frown when they don’t have their way, and our patience lessens.
From 11-15, we often go through the motions as they become their own person that we like/dislike and our lives are full of school events, sports, and “stuff”.
From 16-18, we are just trying to endure to the end. We back off as to not “push them away”, as they scream silently, “Mom, Dad, would you please give me some direction and guidance?” Then high school graduation comes and as they walk across the stage we say, “Where did all the years go? There’s so much more I wish I could teach them…”.
Quite honestly, some parents say, “Get out! You’re 18 now!”
What happened to all the promises we told ourselves? Promises how we’d protect them, provide a stable household for them, tell them that they can always come to us, kisses and “I love you-goo-goo-ga-ga” accompanies with goofy faces.
Tonight, I’d like for you to reflect on whether you are truly still thankful for your children.
Next, ask yourself (and if you are really daring, your wife), if someone you didn’t know were to ask your kids, “Does your dad ACT AND SAY that he loves you?” What would the answer be to that person? What would your kids say?
So your CSD-homework assignment for this week? Tell your child/children that you love them. That’s it. I bet you acted like you did they were born, but what about now?
Let me know how it goes…
If you ever have an opportunity to go to a Life Action Summit, I cannot recommend it enough. It has certainly made a difference in my life and I’m not typing anything to you that I have not had to struggle with myself, as I’m far from the perfect dad. But over the last couple of weeks, I had the opportunity to sit with all five of my children and renew that love that I had for each one of them when they were brought into my life.
Just starting with “I Love You”, can be a way for you to begin that same journey as well.
CSD
Join The CornerstoneDads and Sons Fantasy Football League
CSDs!
Feel free to join our fantasy football league, as we’d like to lock things down and need more teams to draft.
To make things easy for everyone, we’re just going to Autodraft (sorry hardcore folks), but owning a team would be great for you and your son…or even daughter!
The league is hosted by Yahoo (www.yahoo.com) and is called CornerstoneDads and Sons. Just go to the fantasy football join a league page and enter in the league ID: 735939
Hope to see you on the field!
CSD
CSD Snapshots Presents – The Rides of 2012
Happy Father’s Day Men!
CornerstoneDad Snapshots: Beauty and Destruction
CornerstoneDad Privacy Alert: Insurance Companies Want Your Car’s Data
A few years ago, I predicted this was going to happen and folks thought that I had the tin-foil hat on again. But State Farm (and I’m sure others are sure to follow soon) wants your data, urrr….car’s data. Now this isn’t completely new, and trust me, it will one day be common. But lets think about the ramifications.
1.) At least once per week, I travel to a high crime area. Now they already judge me on the number of days I drive my car to the office, and that’s only part of the week, so why would they NOT develop an algorithm to determine the increased risk on the other days?
2.) For you vacation-draft-behind-truck-speeders…gotcha. Forget about your Fuzzbuster (my old school dads know what I’m talking about-that’s a radar detector for those born after 1985), your car will just report that you averaged 79 mph with applied braking at high speeds.
3.) Don’t get me started how they are messing people over by using their credit report as another factor in determining rates.
…can you give us a few more?
What other things do you think the insurance companies will extract from your ride and driving habits?
Oh yea, I bet the amount of the discount for good behavior is never as high as the rate increase for bad behavior. That’s not justice, that’s insurance company mathematics.
What do you think?
Washington Watch Exclusive: The Parents Of Slain Florida Teen Trayvon Martin Speak Out
I will deal with this story and issue soon. In the meantime, I wanted to post this video from Washington Watch, as it knocks down all the stereotypes that I’m sure people are looking for. Many times people will say, “Well, I’m sure something happened to make that guy act that way” or “Maybe the kid was threatening to the man”.
What saddens me the most is that my son and I were just visiting the Orlando area exactly one month ago. I gave him more freedom while we were away than I normally would at home since his other siblings were not there. My heart rate increases when I ponder on the “what-ifs” like, “What if neighborhood watch would have been following him when he was making the one-mile walk to his cousin’s house?” “What if something would have happened when he was out playing football and on his way home just before dark?”
I think I would be thinking just like Trayvon Martin’s dad said in the above video, he would have been waiting on me to protect him, and I would not have been there.
My mentor Dr. Lyn Lewis used to say something to the affect that black men grow up knowing that they are one step from jail or dead, no matter who they are or what they do in life.
I’ll echo another saying she’d say, that’s some good Sociology right there, because this Trayvon Martin murder proves her point. Good kid, good parents, smart, athlete, but still dead like a L.A. gang member.
Lets keep the heat on this story before it gets swept away by more important things like what the Duchess of Cambridge is wearing or what Peyton Manning is doing.











